


Shoveling During a Blizzard

by ellisinprogress1



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Gen, platonic punkymonkey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:40:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25829818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellisinprogress1/pseuds/ellisinprogress1
Summary: cosima and sarah friendship
Relationships: Sarah Manning & Cosima Niehaus
Kudos: 3





	Shoveling During a Blizzard

Sarah is leaning against the kitchen sink. She has a cup of tea in her hand, long cold by now. She isn't drinking it, just staring into the reflection made by the light, and moving it now-and-again. She is focusing on her breathing. In. Hold. Out. Trying to keep calm. 

She hears the distinct sound of Cosima's once lively and bright and purposeful footsteps, now slow and heavy.  
Sarah closes her eyes, she isn't tired of looking after Cosima. She isn't tired of being with her.

Sarah's just tired.

She dumps her tea down the sink, runs the tap, clunks the mug on top of the pile of unwashed dishes. S would kill her if she left that. _A clean home is a happy home._

Sarah stops at the kitchen door. She closes her eyes again.  
In. Hold. Out.  
When she walks into the living room Cosima is sitting on the couch, head in her hands, elbows on her knees. Sarah is leaning against the door frame until she notices the oxygen tank is not down here with Cosima.  
"You need your tank, Cos."

"No, I don't." Her voice is a dead giveaway. She does need it. Cosima leans back where she's sitting without opening her eyes.  
She puts her head against the back of the couch. Opens her eyes to look at the Christmas tree at the other side of the room, closes her eyes again.

"It's January" she says, neutral.  
"Yeah" Sarah says, she smiles to herself. Then, before she can stop herself: "S would-"  
She stops, swallows back what she was going to say. The words fall bitter down her throat.

Sarah walks over to Cosima, who sits forward, allows Sarah to put an arm under hers and lift her weight up. Holding her up, almost completely, they make their way over to the stairs. Slow.

The two of them take one step at a time, stopping at each step. Sarah has time to look at all the pictures on the wall. All in mish-mash frames that have been collected over the years. Sarah and S, Sarah and Cosima and S, Helena and Kira, Felix and Sarah and Kira and S, Sarah and Helena and Cosima.

Cosima leans all her weight into Sarah, breathing slow and shallow. Sarah leans further into the banister so that she doesn't drop the both of them.  
Past Cosima's head she can see the newest photo.  
(Sarah, Cosima, Helena, Alison and Felix all pressed together in the hammock in Alison's backyard, all tangled over each other. Kira, Charlotte, Oscar and Gemma are smushed together on a beanbag, beaming up at the camera. The light from the camera flash and bonfire bleed together and make everyone look bright and soft and alive. Cosima is healthy. Sarah is happy.)

Cosima lifts her head up, blinks at the light from the upstairs bedroom. They make their way up the stairs one at a time. Stopping on every stair. Slow.

Once they get to the bedroom Sarah lowers Cosima onto the bed and pulls her tank over to her. Watches her as she puts it on her nose, hooks it round her ears. Watches Cosima puff out her lips in discomfort, maybe relief, maybe shame. 

"Night, Cos." Sarah says as she walks out the room.  
"Night." she gets back.  
Sarah passes a pile of dirty laundry. S would kill her. _A clean home-_  
She passes the photos on the wall down the stairs. _-happy home._

Sarah pulls her bedding out from behind the couch, sets it up. She faces the tree at first. The lights paint the inside of her eyelids, making them too bright. _-happy home._  
She turns over to face the back of the couch. Cool darkness fills up her eyes, _-happy home._  
fills up her head. She can hear Cosima padding across the ceiling, turning her lamp off, getting into bed. Sarah closes her eyes tight _-happy home._  
and wills herself _-clean-_ to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, let me know what you thought!


End file.
